I have approximately one day until the end of my medical internship / housemanship year. How do I feel about this? Excited, Yes! Happy that I’ll finally be able to get more sleep? Yes!
Rounding up this compulsory one year of my life is one thing I’ve really been looking forward and counting down to. But I can’t shake off the feeling of now what next?
Maybe it’s because I keep getting asked that same question every other day or because every other person I know seems to have it all figured out and are actively taking steps towards their future, which almost all look like this – writing foreign exams to relocate abroad and continue their medical practice.
P.S: IN CASE YOU’RE NEW AROUND HERE AND WONDERING WHAT THIS HOUSEMANSHIP OF A THING IS, I’VE EXPLAINED ALL THAT HERE, TALKED ABOUT GRADUATING MED SCHOOL HERE, MY STRUGGLE TO GET A HOUSEMANSHIP PLACEMENT HEREAND ALSO BLOGGED ABOUT MY FIRST THREE MONTHS OF MY HOUSEMANSHIP IN NIGERIA (LUTH) EXPERIENCE HERE.
Future Plans?
If I were to go with the natural flow of things, it would, of course, be NYSC next affording me another year to answer the question of “what next”? but I realize that the future is now. Not later. It’s here now and I need to start defining what I want mine to look like and start taking steps towards it.
The thing is, I’m still figuring that bit out. Does it make me seem unserious to say that I’m still figuring it out? Every colleague I’ve told that usually gives me a funny look. I’m never quite sure how to explain to them that when I think of my ideal life, the life I’d rather live – I don’t really see “Doctor Ikegbune” in it or “IV lines” and “Ward rounds”. 
So, while I’m super happy to finally be done with my housemanship year. I’m also a bit scared because I feel like my life is really just starting now. The real adulting starts now, and the thoughts of “what if you fail”, “what if you go broke” keeps coming to me but I’m drenching that in crazy to do lists and outlines of what I want to achieve
I can’t say for sure right now that I’d be retaining the Doctor title but one thing I know for sure is that this new phase of my life definitely means more work for me. More work, More dedication, More consistency and more risk taking.
So, Right now?
I’m focusing on completing the 2018 Cassie Daves blog planner in time for the new year, working on expanding the Cassie Daves brand, expanding my mind – Interning in creative houses, picking up new skills and building my Christian life
I’m also thinking of doing an observership in a foreign hospital for a short period of time. Maybe, just maybe it’s the way Medicine is practiced in this country of mine that makes it so unappealing.
Writing this post reminded me of a similar post I wrote way back in 2013 about uncertainties, what-ifs, and whatnots. It’s crazy how it’s 4 years later and that post still finds my heart in the exact same place and still rings true.
Have you ever found yourself at a cross road as regards your professional life and future? How did you overcome that?
Please share and let’s connect!
P.P.S – Check out other posts in my med diary here.
All the best with the future…i know you will excel in whatever you finally decide on.
Congratulations on completing your housemanship
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Thank you Lara and Amen
Thank you Lara! Amen and Amen!
Y did u study medicine in the first place?..was it passion cos if it was that’s enough motivation for u to continue this practice despite the hardships..but since u said u don’t see ur self in this field then I guess u had another reason..anyways all the best in your endeavors
I studied medicine because I was smart. Thank you!
I entirely did the same thing…with an added reason though.
The knowledge would turn out to be priceless should you decided to not go the clinical practice way. Besides, there’s more to medicine than treating patients. How wide can you think to solve the problems you’ve seen in the health sector? That’s one place to start. Praying in God’s will ALWAYS works. You might not get all the answers, but you’d know when you’re on the right path.
Bottom line is trust your heart, trust God, and trust the process. Everything works out for good–not in the end–while in the process. And when the fear comes, just trust God the more.
Dara the OG. My guy! Spitting words of wisdom! 😂 Thank you! Thank you!
I know you’re also in the middle of figuring yours out too so your advice cones well received
Yasss Queen!!!!!! 😂
Honestly I’ve been thinking about this whole being a medical doctor thing permanently for a while now and it just isn’t clicking in my head. I can only see as far as housemanship although I’m in med school rn and hs is still quite far… But I’m low-key panicking I want to relocate to Canada but the thought of writing Carms and other hectic citizenship processes after 6 years of mbbs is just terrifying me. I just want to live life, travel and explore. LITERALLY just carpe diem(ing) after med school tbh. It’s mentally exhausting but I still have a few years to make my mind up. I trust that God that led me to med school will direct me and order my steps to make the right decision about my future.
Ps:I just stumbled on your blog while checking Google for housemanship opportunities today and I’m glaaaaad I did you are so relatable and I’m already obsessed. I cannot believe I just vented all of my fears😂
You don’t know me but I love you❤️
Awww thank you so much! Please if you see this, can you drop me a Hi message on twitter or instagram? I’m @cassiedaves . I’ll love to connect more
Oh Cassie, I really do understand where you are right now, and I just want to let you know that you truly are amazing, and you’d excel in whatever you choose to do. Like you replied above, you are smart!..amongst other things. The fact that you have grown this much shows that there’s so much more waiting for you!! Thank you for opening up to us.
Wishing you the absolute best!! God is with you. Always remrmber 2 Cor 12:9 😊
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Yaaaaaay!!! I really wish you could understand the joy I feel for you. I didn’t leave a comment on a post with theladyvodka cause I had something to say about every single question and answer (it was reeeeally GREAT 😣) This time around, I don’t want to care. 😂
I get the “what’s next?” question more than there’s sunshine in a day (sort of an exaggeration) and depending on who is asking, when someone is asking, etc, that question provokes different effects and different responses… I don’t think of myself as a conventional person at all so trust me when I say I get you. I love to understand my path or the path that has been carved out for me by God and follow through.
I’m learning to speak up,stick with my passions and ale sure that what my heart truly beats for isn’t swallowed up by popular opinion, unsolicited advice, the fear/disbelief of others and the fear/doubt which sometimes trickle in my own mind…
You are were you need to be; in that place where not everything has been figured out and it’s OK. The problem arises when you are complacent. I tell you, you having a sense of what you want to do, who you want to be or not is H.U.G.E!!! Your satisfactions and disatisfactions are great pointers that you are in the beautiful process of being who God has called you to be. One day at a time; one moment at a time, Cassie. You are doing WELL so far, you are winning at adulting, so far!
Chaaaaaai. It seems this thing wants to be a post on it’s own. I continue jare.
Can I say how I’m doing a dance? I don’t know if I missed it somewhere but this is the First time, I’m hearing the “2018 Cassie Daves Blog Planner” I mean, it feels like this official release/statement that the 2018 CDBP is on za waaaaaay 💃🏾💃🏾👏🏽
Lemme round up… There’s nothing that doesn’t have what ifs… at all but we plunge in because we believe, we plunge in because we know our feelings aren’t always right and we know that a lot of times, we just need faith bigger than that fear to go ahead.
Will everything work out the way you hope, pray,desire, imagine? Maybe or not (usually not),would we make mistakes? Most definitely. Would we have all the answers and everything figured out before we set out? Not really. Would there be setbacks? Oh! Yes there will; but, there’s also SO MUCH light on your path, so much love and with these, giiiiiiiiiiirl, you are good to go. All the wisdom, strength, favor you need is already with you, Cassie. You’ve got to realise that and lean into that truth to unlock it everyday.
Btw, the observership program in Graz, Austria is 👌
If I ended up blabbing a lot, remember: I believe you’ll be everything you truly desire to be and so much more. I know that.
.
http://becauseibelieveblog.com
Awww ,funny enough you are not alone my dear.Everything will fall into its place.Keep firing!!!
Is it safe to say I’m super proud of you even though we don’t “know” each other? Well, I am! I’m certain you’ll figure things out. Take it slow, keep pushing! You’ve got a whole army rooting for you.
Congratulations on sticking it out, Cassie. There’s nothing as horrible as being stuck in a place you’d rather not be in, so I wish you light in this season. A different perspective of medicine may be perfect! Any changes you need to make, now is the time!
All the best.
Love and Light,
Viv AF
http://www.thealaroro,com
Aww, this means no more housemanship posts from you soon. I really enjoyed reading those but also happy for you to start out the next phase of your life whatever that might be.
This is me right now too trying to answer what next questions from people while navigating that path with some uncertainty. It’s defiinitely not easy but hopefully at the end of the day it’ll all be worth it.
Good luck, Cassie!!
Oh there’s ons more housemanship post left lol before its over. Plus don’t mind me, I’ll also do Mg NTSC which means some time of working in a health care centre too
Been reading your blog for a long time and just wanted to tell you that you are amazing, a MD. and a fantastic blogger all in one. Cassie, I know you will do well whatever you choose to do, Keep shining, the world is yours !
Congrats on finishing housejob! Time does fly. Seems like yesterday when you started and now you’re rounding up.
I kinda understand the crossroad you’re at.
Was at the same cross till after nysc when I wrote primaries.
I haven’t still figured it out, as each day I wonder if clinical medicine is for me.
An observership will be great in helping you take the next step. And researching foreign exams too.
Congrats on finishing housejob! Well done. I honestly try not to put too much pressure on myself but obviously it’s almost impossible. God will help us o.
Congratulations on your housemanship, I’ve been following your tweets bout it so i can imagine how you feel bout it now.
You’re not alone on thinking bout what next … when i finished school last year i was so bothered bout it… stressing myself what next and feeling bad i didn’t have everything figured out like everyone else.
The plan was to use the nysc year to figure it out and all, think bout it no stress but then it didn’t work out and i ended up spending the year at home.
Was so mad and sad at first cos it was a very silly mishap but then after a month i just decided to look at the positive and go with flow and allow things fall into place.
I still don’t know what the future holds but I’m no longer stressing or worried. The only plan I’ve right now is to let things fall into place, focus on now and just do my best.
So yeah now it would seem all your mates have it figured out but don’t let them bother you.. focus on you and don’t let fear hold you back from trying out new things and exploring.
All the best and i pray everything works out for you.
Such a long ass comment lol, forgive me
Hey Cassie!! I can relate so hard to this post. I absolutely do not like being asked about what next or what i want to do but I just started reading the alchemist (I’ve been on such a mental high) and I think deep down you know what next. Dont allow menial things cloud your judgment. I believe in you. Please!! Not too pressure you but Im lowkey counting on you🙌🙌🙌🌟🌟🌟 Pray to Jesus and ask for clarity, you’ll figure it out soon enough✨✨✨
Lemonadesociety.blogspot.com
Hi Cassie, congrats on completing housemanship. Why are they giving you funny looks? Just because you’ve taken a path for a while doesn’t mean you have to want to continue in it. I guess they don’t understand how a person could put in all that work and leave it. Crowd mentality is pushing a lot of people. I know a number of doctors struggling through everyday, hating what they do, but they continue because that’s what they’re “supposed” to be doing, having read medicine.
At least you’re willing to take the chance to do what you actually want to do.
I’m passionate about medicine. I could practice anywhere. I just want to do it in a place with structure, where basic things we need to work are not a luxury and where I can develop and grow in my profession without struggle, while getting paid what I deserve. But If I didn’t have that opportunity I’d still do medicine.
So I understand why someone would want to do what they enjoy. You are creative, you’re an entrepreneur, you’re good at it and you enjoy it. You also happen to be very smart. you became a doctor in Nigeria with all the STRUGGLE it takes here, without even being crazy about the medicine. That takes a huge amount of drive. I have no doubt you’ll figure out your path; whether in non-clinical medicine or completely outside of it, and you will excel at it.
Oh, and even with all my plans, I’m far from having it all figured out. I’m terrified of moving permanently away from my country. I haven’t settled on a specialty; it keeps changing and I’m deathly scared of picking the wrong one. Everybody with their own wahala.
Keep going Cassie. Keep praying. We will all be okay.
It’s a long comment but I just had to.
Good luck with figuring out what you want to do! i find quite a few of nigerian med students just ended up in medicine because they were smart / good with the sciences or under their parents guidance…which isn’t great tbh medicine is a huge sacrifice in term of years/dedication/hardwork even when it is your passion not to talk of when it isn’t …. oh well atleast now you can branch out to different areas nowadays not just traditional dr role with a medical degree which is good. plus you are also a blogger. the world is your oyster! chin up 🙂
Hello Cassie, congrats on completing your housemanship year, you survived!
It’s not a crime not to have it figured out just yet. Everyone is running a different race.
Look back at the time when you were wondering when you will start your housemanship and like play you are done. So don’t worry my dear, Jesus who did it then will do it again. He will sort you out! Just focus on being productive.
This is a nice post cassie ..
It’s interesting you note why your studied medicine is because youre smart. That’s what happens to the smartmkids and then some others who has a lot of passion for it.
Practice in nigeria can be frustrating because you can’t do a lot for patients as you would want to. However when it comes to relationships and workplace ethics and things, it’s pretty much the same .. the intern is the underdog. The older ones enjoy. It is worthy taking out tome to really figure iut what you want to do and for me , my nysc year was was did it. During house job I was 24 and trying to understand what else there was to life. I know I didn’t want to be broke but I sure also knew I was happy to be a doctor although house job sucked the joy out of me. My defining moment was retuning home to see that while I was away my parents had grown older.that was the reality of it. Things are much more organised outside here but the work is a lot harder and there are always legal things to watch your back for. House job isn’t really a time when you get to love medicine. Nysc is what makes you cherish your degree and your knowledge. When you get to help people on your terms. I took time out to pursue medicine and I discovered that regardless of what you find interesting in life, you can always make money out of it in the medical world. You can engineer products, write software code for apps, make fancy scrubs ( we don’t even have an official scrub maker in nigeria) you can do community medicine.. there are a ton of options. My first suggestion is however regardless of all the souls earthing and finding you want to do.. write ielts and plab. Consider it an investment for your future. I would beg you if I could or if it would work. Write ielts . Write play. Register with the gmc then go and find yourself and any other thing you would like to find
I don’t think it makes you unserious, I think it is perfectly normal although I can totally get why your colleagues would have a funny look. Medicine is a difficult and strenuous practice so to come all the way and not want it anymore can be shocking to hear. Still, do you, I wish you all the best…xxx
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It’s okay not to have all the answers, you are not alone. The truth is everything usually works itself out. The goal is to keep moving forward and walking?working with God. He makes all things beautiful in His own time. Congratulations on completing your housemanship
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This is a wonderful post,it is just good to know that I’m not alone. I believe the way medicine is being practiced in our country is very frustrating,and as such it tends to discourage one from pushing further. Just carry on with what makes you happy,cos life is too short
Hi Cassie.
Congratulations on the completion on your housemanship, Read through your chronicles and i could appreciate the struggle, so weldone for having finished!
Re: what next, definitely think about it seriously but it’s totally okay and normal to take a while figuring it out. So many people are struggling with this too, even people who seem that they have it figured out.
I suggest you talk to a few people who are on similar paths as the one you (really) wish to follow (creatives), and well as a few people on the path you’re currently on (medical). Their perspectives might help you.
I also believe that the observship in a foreign country/setting will help a great deal, this country is pure hell on the soul!
Someone in the comments mentioned looking at other areas of healthcare that you can add value, i agree.
As a marketing/brand person, i understand the power of identifying and filling need gaps. So maybe you can look at the healthcare industry at large, to see if there’s a purpose you can fill.
Lastly, take your time. If you get a good hospital to fully practise for a while, maybe a year, you can give it a shot and see how you feel after the year.
Whatever it is you decide, make sure that it’s what YOU chose for YOURSELF, otherwise it won’t be worth it.
Good luck and may God guide you.
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Something I hold onto really tight is God’s word that says, “He will bless the works of your hand… Not that exact thing that your hand is doing now; but anything your hand finds to do. So follow your dreams and trust God all the way. I hope this helps
Thanks a lot for sharing your experience .🙌🏽👏🏾 I read your other blog post today and I must confess you’re the real MVP. I’ll be resuming my final year next week and i just keep thinking about a lot! Future, housemanship, coming back to nigeria, what nigerian doctors think about most of us that studied in not so foreign countries I.e Georgia, Cyprus, Ukraine etc.. lol no offense . God bless you! Me being extra 😩😂. (I am Bisola Odunayo’s Sister..You took pictures of her few years bck abt modeling on your blog)
Hi Cassie, first off, congrats! I understand how you feel because I felt the same way when I was thinking of what to do other than practicing law.
If you still want to work in the medical field you can consider becoming a consultant in some areas, maybe hospital management, business side or something. That way, you won’t really be practicing medicine but still get to feel involved. Not sure how the industry works though but you can figure it out from your one year experience.
Otherwise, follow your dreams and do whatever makes you happy.
I guess only few people really have it all figured after school and that’s totally fine in my opinion. Wish you the very best!
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Same goes with me. I’m very certain that pharmacy practice is not for me. I’m still figuring that out but definitely after internship, I hope it would be clear.
My friends look at me crazy when I tell them pharmacy is not the purpose for my life.
With that said, purpose and passion would give you the success you’re looking for. Don’t let fear of failing cripple your thoughts and what God has called you to do.
I’m so sorry for this epistle but this post connects with me on different
levels.
http://www.stylelately.wordpress.com
Every one here has advised rightly but in the end it’s still your shot to call. I pray God in his wisdom guides you into the truth. What matters is now, so whatever your hand finds to do, do it well. The dots will connect in with time. God bless you.
http://www.ijefinelivin.com
I know this is a bit late but I’d say if you could, try and push NYSC out of the way- like get it done and over with. I had to come back to Nigeria for it and in hindsight, it is not the best feeling in the world. I know how it feels to be at this point of dreading clinical practice (esp in Nigeria) but there are so many other things you can do combining your Med skills and creative side (here in Nigeria and abroad). I ventured into research and I don’t regret it
Lol…I’m a medical student and can completely understand what you are saying. I don’t see my future with ward rounds or calls. I’m even looking for a speciality with no calls, a 9-5 and free weekends( I know you are thinking public health). My mates are moving faster than me and I feel as transfixed in time as I was 3 years ago when I came to med school. My only hope is that impermanence exists and so does my faith that things will get better.
This is the story of my life now as a pharmacist..At crossroads and scared to even try anything outside pharmacy because that’s like the only thing i know…Lol..
Still figuring it out sha..Hopefully I may reignite the creative side I have that was extinguished by pharmacy school